Shirt porn...beware

I had a whinge about Nike just the other day. I used the Nike Run app to map and time my jog and as I passed the 2.5km of 5km mark on my second run in three weeks (prop bod still firmly intact) when the voice of professional comedic screecher Kevin Hart interrupted the nosebleed techno I was blasting out of my headphones. He was there to reassure me I was doing 'really well'. But like Mr Hart's film career, this assertion was a load of bollocks. I was hanging out of my arse and seriously considering hailing an uber. Annoying inaccuracy, it could have been a White House press briefing. 

Nike, all is forgiven. Bravo. Just bravo. Where can I buy these please? Argentina get all the best kits.  

Sunwolves 2017 kit launch video

Well at least this is Canterbury stash because it aint the promotional video that's gonna get Sunwolves kits sold this season.

Game gone soft...apparently

How many times have we heard this over the past couple of weeks form ex pro 'pundits'.

'Games got soft...they'll be banning tackling next' (or words to that effect).

Beale, Haylett-Petty, Brookes. All players that rightly or wrongly may have felt aggrieved by their marching orders in recent weeks.

Firstly, if you throw accusations like 'games gone soft' around, it instantly smacks of rose-tinted nostalgia of your own career, when kicking people in the head and punching people at the bottom of a ruck when the ref wasn't looking was seen as the height of alpha-masculinty. The world has moved on guys, so should the sport. No one is debating a bit of measured violence isn't sometimes a bit of a shot in the arm for a game, but long gone are the days of Dooley, Ackford and Richards strolling around the pitch smacking people to assert their authority because taking your warrant card on the pitch was frowned upon.

Secondly, the game very clearly hasn't gone soft. The rules have changed, not the players. They still love smashing people, its just become harder to judge how high you can get away with.

Thirdly, I agree that some of the yellows being chucked out are ludicrous, but World Rugby and the constituent unions have a huge PR problem at the moment with parents reluctant to let their kids play a sport that you can so clearly draw a direct line between repeated head trauma and later life health problems. They have to take action for the sake of participation in the game and the image of the game. I am not usually one to defend World Rugby, but on this front they are just adjusting to a changing sports market, with the most noble of concerns at the core of it, player safety.

So please just calm down. World Rugby doesn't want traditional fans turned off the game, so will probably look at the laws and adjust accordingly when necessary. They also don't want kids and parents scared of early onset dementia if they go near a rugby ball, so the game has to change. Lets just all take a deep breath.

Hartley was definitely a red card though. Naughty.

Howley? Ok...

It's not just Howley that worries me, and to be fair to him he was head of attack in 2013. However, 2013 Australia were a team clearly all over the place (James O'Connor at 10 anyone?) and to be brutally honest, the game has moved on significantly, beyond one out runners and limited backline movement. It's not Howley that worries me essentially, but the lack of support he will have. Gatland will offer a little in attack, perhaps even Farrell, but Borthwick won't be interested and by all accounts it could be Mike Friday helping him out, with a bit of skills coaching thrown in for good measure. I love Friday, but he's been away from the 15 man game for years and the Lions is so intense, so precise, so delicate in its execution that it just feels too risky. No one is doubting his coaching ability, but it seems a little left-field, even for the Lions which is not necessarily scared of making odd but sometimes genius selections.

Farrell is a great shout, having really redeemed his credentials since taking over defence in Ireland. Some of the contact in the New Zealand games was outright scary and Ireland showed another level of physicality we all knew was probably there, but Faz seems to have unlocked. People forget he was a key cog in the new age Saracens setup and presided over a very stingy defence in the Lions tour of 2013 (with above caveat in mind).

Borthwick. The man is the best forwards coach in the world. That's all I have to say.

In short, set-piece and defence seem pretty solid. Attack I am officially worried about. 

The Demise of London Welsh - Game Over

London Welsh is a club which has long lived in the rugby public consciousness, in the amateur era for mainly positive reasons, in the pro era, mostly for negative.

Players have been told to find new jobs, three weeks leading up to Christmas. They need a quarter of a million pounds to stay afloat it seems all options have dried up. A winding up order by HMRC now seems inevitable.

The fact this club has been allowed into this state is an incredibly sad thing. I played at the ground on a number occasions and was genuinely excited to play on the same pitches as so many welsh legends. I had a Wales U16 trial there, played for Nottingham there as well as loads of age group and minis fixtures. I hope to god they can keep hold of their iconic ground. You can almost hear the property developers in the area smacking their lips.

London Welsh, Plymouth Albion and Jersey, all teams that sit just below the Premiership but the gulf couldn't seem bigger in terms of support, finance and management. The RFU and Premier Rugby need to sort this out sharpish. It's not as if they haven't got the bleedin' money.

More on this matter later, but I can't help but be utterly depressed by yet another huge name in rugby fall by the wayside. It took neighbours Richmond and London Scottish the better part of fifteen years to get back to somewhere near their former glory. Fans must be praying that after being mucked around for the last few years, stronger foundations are put in place for sustainability at the club in the future, if it even has one. 

RGN Autumn International Awards - Forwards

The Patronising Award for Most Improved Player - Tom Wood
I never really got it with Tom Wood during the Lancaster era. He seemed to be loved by pundits, loved by the Franklins Gardens faithful, but seemed to not do much, playing for England at least. I then thought he was maybe one of those Richard Hill types, you know the ones who do a lot of the donkey stuff but little of the flashy stuff. I then made a point of watching him for a whole game and seeing what he did and coming out the other end non the wiser.

When I saw he'd been called back up to the squad it raised an eyebrow or two from fans and pundits alike, especially as Eddie Jones had called him lazy and average in the public domain on a couple of occasions. This reverse psychology obviously worked and Wood made a big impact, especially in the final match where he seemed to be making the most of an opportunity he probably thought he wasn't going to get near this season. Do I think he's an England star, or a starter, no. However, his presence in the team and seamless integration into the squad is evidence of a squad and incentive based selection system which is clearly working.

The John Bentley Award for surprise bolter for Lions Selection - Tadhg Furlong
No other reason than the below video. If it takes this many All Blacks to take down one mad irishman, then surely he's got to win. The Irish front row has come a long way in a short space of time, with Cronin and Healy on the bench, there is genuine depth in this team and some of them could find themselves in front of the more established England front row for Lions spots.

The Jonah Lomu Award for being 'Quick for a big lad' - Josh Van der Flier

This guy has been on the radar for a while, World Cup U20s watchers will know he's been turning heads for a some time. But my word, this kid is an athlete. Now he was a wing in a past life so he, despite being a charlatan, has made it into the list on the technicality that he wears a number seven on his back. To his credit, his tackle count is nearly as impressive as his running, and his running is off the chain.

The Yoann Huget Moment of Madness Award - Enrique Pieretto
Yes Marler had hold of his foot, but there is no excuse for this. Maybe he thought the off-season wasn't quite long enough for Southern Hemisphere players and he fancied a few more weeks off. Maybe he was mates with Samson Lee. Whatever the reason, he got seven weeks for it.

England vs Australia - The Debrief

A whole year undefeated. The resources of the richest union in the rugby world combined with the most experienced coach in in the game today. This feels like when the white power ranger joined the original power rangers to make a brand new megazord. Sort of.

I don't want to get all drunk on the RFU kool-aid but there does seem to be something quite special going on. Follow the current squads tweets for a couple of days, as well as Haskell's behind the scenes coverage, this is a squad enjoying playing and enjoying winning.

I listened to the first twenty minutes on the radio and was obviously horrified, but even still I wasn't panicked. Once the clear anxiety some players were feeling, being overly pumped some of them (Mike Brown) they realised that their defence had managed to keep out most of what one of the the most dangerous backlines in world rugby could throw at them. They came back into the game by force of will, brutal defence and some of the most clinical attacking I've seen from this team since 2002/03. This has led to England having a better win % than the All Blacks, although admittedly not having played them

Angry. Passionate. Hard as f...

Then there are the players who stepped in during the injuries England suffered after the Australia tour. Even with Launchbury suspended, will still had Kruis and Lawes to fill the second row, with Itoje, Attwood, Ewels still in reserve at some point in the future. Sinckler came off the bench and made a huge impact. Hartley, the captain for crying out loud, came off for Jamie George and the team barely broke stride. Tom Wood, a player who I have been overtly critical of to my mates for years, was nothing short of heroic all afternoon. Yarde has looked dangerous, if not always assured. Joseph appears to have a lot more in the tank than just a lethal step and the Ford/Farrell axis could be the cornerstone for the team for years to come. I cannot wait until the Six Nations and the match versus Ireland, it is going to be massive.

The event that summed up the afternoon had to be Jonny May's kick-off chase. Hard running, hard tackle, from a player who wasn't exactly known for his physicality in the contact. He has been given license by Jones and Gustard to use his biggest asset, his electric speed, as a defensive tool. I went to a conference once when Gustard laid out his defensive mindset, in the early days of the Saracens revolution. He said Saracens don't see defence and attack as two different things. They are interchangeable and tackling, counter-rucking and attempts at turnovers are just the start of an attack, and what better place to attack from than ten metres behind the attacking teams line. Check 1:26:30 below to remind yourselves what that looks like.

So much to be excited about. Eddie Jones is wary of waxing lyrical about his team, and with good reason, saying they are still not as good as the 2003 side. The carrot and stick of the regime has brought incredible results in a very short space of time, so why on earth would you stop now. 

Gregor Townsend turns down Lions coaching role

This is really not good news for the Lions. Gregor has had a key role in getting Scottish players back to the cut and thrust attack of the amateur era, promoting a game involving keeping the ball alive and attacking with purpose and support. Anyone who watched Ireland beat the Kiwis a couple of weeks ago knows the importance of relentless attacking against the ABs.

With Eddie Jones in charge of attack for England and not interested in going anywhere with the Lions, and Schmidt seemingly fulfilling a similar role for Ireland, one can only predict what's coming.

Rob Howley...Lions Attack Coach

Anyone who has watched Wales over the past few weeks saw a backline bereft of ideas, ingenuity and a clue. Now this could be a symptom of systems put in place before he took sole charge in the absence of Gatland, but to be honest, this 'Warrenball' is probably just as much as his creation as Gatland's.

I'm just not sure attritional, one out runners is the key against the All Blacks. The most exciting Wales have looked in recent times was when their bench was dry during the World Cup, throwing caution to the wind and throwing a scrum-half on as wing. The autumn internationals have been a depressing affair for them. Those tasked with coaching attack have to share in the responsibility of this.

As evidence of the negative attack approach Wales seem to take, we have seen offloading and barnstorming back-rows seem to make the difference against New Zealand, and Wales have one of those in Justin Tipuric. The Welsh management's seeming reluctance to use him in the starting XV probably says everything you need to know about their attacking intent, opting for Lydiate and Warburton if given the chance. Even Faletau before he got injured playing for Bath seemed to have been told to 'calm down the flashy stuff' a bit.

I hear Alex King is available having left Northampton Saints 'by mutual consent'. Amazing how firing him hasn't seemed to solve their problems, almost as if the issues lie elsewhere...

But please not Rob Howley. Great scrum-half as he was, the game has moved past where Wales currently are attacking wise, and the Lions need a significantly more creative source of inspiration. 

Ground Review...Sale's AJ Bell Stadium

An insight into my thoughts as we made our way to the AJ Bell Stadium from our swanky airbnb in the Northern Quarter to see Sale take on Toulon in the Champions Cup.

WHY IS THERE SO MUCH TRAFFIC? WHY ARE SO MANY F-ING PEOPLE AT THE TRAFFORD CENTRE ON A F-ING FRIDAY NIGHT? WHY DO SALE NOT PLAY IN SALE? WHY DOES IT TAKE AN HOUR BY CAR TO GET TO THE GROUND FROM THE CENTRE OF MANCHESTER? WHAT WAS WRONG WITH STOCKPORT? ARRRGGHHHHH!!!

The makers of the M60 flyover were inadvertently the pioneers of the 'Drive-In' Sporting Event

Apparently, talking to other fans, I am not alone in these thoughts.

The ground itself was very nice. Good beers too. Didn't get to meet Brian Mujati though.

If the new owners are wondering while Sale struggle to get traction in a sports market flooded with well connected, well supported and top flight clubs, addressing the fact the ground is in the middle of an industrial swampland would be a good first point of self-reflection.

The Uber driver explained 'You might do better on foot'...

Sale is a club that is solidly good but always just seems to miss its mark to be great. It sells its best players to Wasps, its amateur(ish) club has a better ground than they do and they have put off at least three away fans from ever bothering to go there again. In light of what I saw as a 2/3rds filled stadium, this is not a market they can necessarily ignore.

Oh no, I thought he'd stopped all this...

It comes a time in a man's life when he simply has to stop. Stop because your body is screaming at you. Stop dreaming of one day being a professional sportsman. Stop putting life on hold just in case Saracens come in at the 11th hour to sign you up like a rugby version of Dennis Quaid's 'The Rookie'. Stop thinking 'If I'd only done this then and then that the other time then maybe I could have...'. Just stop.

That time came for me two days ago when I emailed my current rugby club, St Albans RFC, to tell them the boots were well and and truly being hung up. The bulging disc in my neck has yet again become inflamed and I promised myself, my body, my wife, I'd give myself one more go at it and next big injury, the big tap-out. That go has now come to an end. I have become an ex-rugby player. Three knee surgeries, two shoulder surgeries, countless broken ribs, one broken wrist, one broken ankle and the bugling disc have all conspired to create one big metaphorical lump of drag on my person. 

It was inevitable. I've been dropping my phone, cups of tea and lesson resources all over the shop over the last couple of weeks because of the nerve impingement the bulging disc causes The last time this happened it took me nine months of recovery and no sport, so I thought I better get cracking.

There are things I'll miss. Excited anxiety pre-match, cold beers after the game, satisfying delayed onset muscle soreness the day after a match. The ability to eat as much as I wanted on the justification 'I'm in the front row and I need to keep my weight on'. Apparently in normal circles being 5'10 and 18 stone is not acceptable. 

There are things I won't. Coaches who spew the RFU coaching manual like its a work of religious inspiration, delayed onset muscle soreness the five days after you played, the human inequality of finding yourself in the defensive line and having to mark their winger. 

I'm no loss to the sport, to be brutally honest I probably peaked playing wise at school back in 2001. For the last fifteen years I've just about been hanging on, playing in the abject fear of an alternative Saturday spent at the Harlequin shopping centre. 

But rugby is like the Hotel California, you don't ever really leave. So I need to find some way of staying connected with the game. Coaching in time is probably where I'll end up, but for the time being I may reconnect with this blog, see where it takes me. 

Goodbye playing days, hello armchair punditry. My keyboard is being sharpened as we speak. 

Help!

In other boring news...

The International Rugby Board is to rebrand itself as 'World Rugby'.

Christ.

Mickey Rourke to play Gareth Thomas in biopic - eh?

This story has been around for ages but apparently Rourke reignited interest in the project on a US chat show this week.

Mickey Rourke is great and hats off to him for wanting to make the film in the first place but surely this is why casting directors play such an important role in Hollywood?

Firstly Gareth is massive, and so can Rourke be to be fair as his showing in the great 'The Wrestler' would attest to. But things, even in 'The Wrestler', were clearly going south for Rourke.

Secondly, Thomas' accent is thick. And niche. And hard to emulate. American actors sometimes have a tin ear for celtic accents.

Five words: Brad. Pitt. The. Devils. Own.

I personally would love to see a rugby film that doesn't blow like the bloody awful 'Invictus' or the B movie standard 'Forever Strong'. This is a great human story about a player dealing with his own complicated feelings about his sexuality whilst playing a hyper-masculine sport and being in the public eye. I hope to god they go for someone like Chris Hemsworth or someone who could be more believable. If not, Rourke will have to call in Jack Nicholson to play Ieuan Evans and Robert Patrick to be Rob Howley for consistency purposes.

RFU smashes down gender barriers...sort of

Off the back of a fine showing at the Women's Rugby World Cup and the media finally waking up to what a special side this England team is, there was some welcome news today as the RFU announced the women's sevens program will now include 20 full time professional, and most importantly, central contracts. Unlike the men's sevens squad, the women's team is used as a genuine development platform for the 15-a-side game so a lot of the those who won the world cup (about 12) will now be able to train and play as professionals, not that they hadn't been already.

Words fail me how much respect I have for this team. They work normal jobs, but train as pros would and still have the energy to give so much back the community they are a part of.

As a father of a young daughter worried about an alarming lack of positive female role models in the British mainstream media, I will definitely be pushing her to the exceptional examples of Alphonsi, Waterman and Scarratt.

She kicks, she scores and I would probably not tackle her.

http://www.espn.co.uk/england/rugby/story/238727.html 

ALS and the ICE challenge

To my shame I didn't have much of a clue about ALS before this whole campaign started. All I know is that famous people having icy water chucked on them is never boring, much like cat videos on youtube...

Here are few of my favourites from the rugby world. However, in a sport in which ice baths are common practice, does it lose some of its impact?

Not really. In other circles, the Rosie Huntingon-Whiteley bird going out with that Jason Statham is worth a look, but we don't go in for that sort of thing here. This is a rugby blog and you can all use google.

Neglectful, moi?

If you are one of the people still checking back at RGN, thank you and I apologise for being a disgrace and not keeping content up. With many false dawns, mine and my wife's first child and a generally mental work life have all kept this blog on the backburner.

For this, I am sorry.

However, with the little one gaining a semblance of differentiation between night and day, my generally oversensitive nature towards lethargy being more in check and my need to talk codswallop about a game so ridiculous in nature that the very ball it is played with is a constant victim to chaos theory, have all led me back to the warm bosom of this blog.

In short, I'm back.

Like Cleggers, I'm sorry. But you know, genuinely. 

Is there a BOD?

I don't recall how I felt when BOD was dropped for the final test. All I remember is how great it was when we won by so much, making a mockery of a team that was rich in talent but poor in unity. However, having watched the below video, there is a part of me that thinks what more did the centers we eventually went for offer than this man?

Watch and ask yourself the same question.

Lions Raw - Tonight Sky Sports 2 - 10pm

         

Just watch. If these two trailers are anything to go by, wow.

Canterbury Cuffs

Those who remember from a while back I got quite excited about the prospect of Canterbury taking over the design and production of the new England rugby kit. They did a decent job, but their latest attempt has frankly left me baffled. 

There isn't much you can do with the color, I understand that. However, effectively keeping it the same and adding a black cuff to a short sleeve shirt makes my head hurt. Someone has reliably informed me that it is indeed dark blue but it looks black and with colours I believe its all about what it looks like rather than what marketing types tell me. 'My polo shirt is burnt terracotta'. No its not, its orange so shut the hell up and go buy yourself another skinny chai latte....

The training kit looks swish but you expect that from Canterbury. I'm hoping the disappointment of the new kit is just a ploy and a lead up to all the players ripping off their sleeves in a 'beserker' type rage before kick-off and going sleeveless 'Chuck Norris' on the un-prepared opposition.

Canterbury - Must.Do. Better.

Aviva Premiership 13/14 Top 4: All Change or Stay as You Were?

I though it might be good idea to see who the movers and shakers are after round 5 of the Aviva Premiership. It has been a fantastic few weeks, throwing up some great running rugby and some shock results to boot. 

Sitting pretty at the top of the pile are Saracens. A team this year, who seem determined to rip off those shackles and play the running rugby we so desperately asked of them.  With a backline boasting some of the most lethal finishers in the country it was about time they lived up to their billing. Throw into the mix a much beefier pack with additions Billy Vunipola and James Johnston and you start to see a side who have a well rounded edge and little in the way of weaknesses. The first 3 games optimised this and bonus point wins over London Irish, Gloucester and Bath showed a mixture of ‘forwards’ grunt and ‘backs’ prowess. Combine this with two gritty wins over Harlequins and Wasps and you see that Saracens haven’t lost their ‘wolfpack’ mentality.

They have also been lucky with injuries and with Will Fraser and Neil De Kock back to full fitness they have an abundance of talent to choose from.  Saracens are so good, that they can even bring players back from the brink of extinction......Jacques Burger. A one man wrecking ball, who is back and better than ever. Even a stamp to the face leading to 9 stitches on his eye lid can’t stop him having two man of the match performances.  We still haven’t seen the likes of Tim Streather, Championship Player of the season last year and with great strength in depth in all positions you can see Saracens pushing for honours across Europe this year. 

Northampton sit comfortably in second place and personally I feel they pose a real threat to take the top prize this year. After agonisingly missing out for a few seasons, could this be their year? From what I’ve seen, they look physical from 1 to 15. They too have made some excellent acquisitions in Kahn Fotuali’i and Lions superstars Alex Corbisiero and Geroge North and was it not for some horrific refereeing decisions against Gloucester they would be even hotter on the heels of Saracens. 

After the loss of Mujati and Tongahuia it was debated whether or not they would cope this season. Alex Corbisiero has done a great job since arriving and Tom Mercey for me, would be ‘work in progress.’ It’s the power from the second row and back row where Northampton look so strong. Samu Manoa and Courtney Lawes provide a shuddering amount of grunt and with a back row of Dowson, Wood and Van Velze, they are never short of any ‘go forward.’ The backs also look incredibly strong. The Pisi brothers have made a name for themselves in the midfield and add to that George North and Luther Burrell and you have a set of battering rams ready to get you over the gain line. 

Northampton definitely missed a trick on Saturday when they let Leicester back into the game at Welford Road. That would have been a real statement of intent and possibly highlights their one area of weakness.....their mentality.  I think back to the Premiership semi-final against Saracens at Franklins Gardens when Myler bottled the attempt at a drop goal. It is these moments that define winners and losers and I had a sense they still lack that killer instinct. If they can adopt that, then they really are in contention for some silverware this season.

Leicester complete the top three and with their coach having to sit and watch from a porter cabin, you would say they have done well. To me they are not the force of old but their never say die attitude and knowledge of how win still sees them competing in the top 4. The team looks like it is going through a rebuilding process. The loss of players such as Geordan Murphy and George Chuter means that the number of on field generals is reduced and players such as Toby Flood, Louis Deacon and Dan Cole now need to really step up and be counted. Their forwads still seem a very stable force and this was demonstrated on Saturday with the dismantling of Northampton’s scrum. Salvi is still one of the best number  7’s in the country and Jordan Crane is getting back to his best with his lung bursting runs and solid defence.

It is in the backs where I feel there is cause for concern.  Injury to Tuilagi has meant that Goneva has been moved from wing to centre. He did well against Exeter but was really found out against a much stronger backline in Northampton.  His Fijian style tackling technique means he often flies up for the big hit. More often than not against Northampton he missed, leaving the midfield exposed. When Scully was forced off they brought Dan Bowden onto the field as a make shift winger. To me it highlighted a lack of strength in depth outside of the fly half and could be Leicester’s undoing this season.

Bath are the final team currently sitting in the play off positions. Is it shock? Probably not, considering the squad they have assembled for this season.  The biggest plus for Bath, the two fingers they have given to all their doubters over the form of George Ford.  Touted as one of the worst moves to make (from Leicester to Bath) he has played with aplomb so farm, orchestrating 3 wins out of 5. To start with, they have an excellent coaching set up in Gary Gold, Mike Ford and Toby Booth. Add to this a whopping pack with new additions Alafoti Fa'osiliva, Leroy Houston and Matt Garvey and a backline with international class and you see that Bath could be starting to fulfil their potential.

Their backs look electric and could pose the meanest of defences a problem. New acquisitions Jonathon Joseph and Anthony Watson join a back division which boasts Matt Banahan, Tom Biggs and the ever impressive Semesa Rokoduguni. Add to this two international fly halves in George Ford and Tom Heathcote and you have the makings of a very potent back line. There is even everyone’s favourite Gavin Henson. I still stand by what I said when he joined Saracens. If he can get back to the form he had when he burst on to the scene then Bath have made a very astute signing. If he doesn’t find that form then Bath will look equally as stupid as Saracens, Toulon and Cardiff Blues and Henson’s career will head further down the pan!

The one area of definite weakness is their squad strength! I know Francois Louw is still to return and this is fantastic news, but against Saracens they really lacked a cutting edge. The first few weeks they had been unstoppable, defeating Leicester at the Rec was a definite highlight. Against a rampaging Saracens at Allianz Park they decided to rest/bench their top players and it proved to be their undoing in a 31-17 drubbing. They shipped 31 points in the first half and was it not for these rested players coming on in the second half, it could have been even worse. 

Will the top 4 stay this way? We will have to see. I can’t see Saracens or Northampton being dislodged but 3^rd and 4^th are definitely up for grabs. I will assess the merits of the teams further down the table in my next article and asses whether or not we have the potential for a shift of power in the Aviva Premiership.